If you’re into self help books at all, then you might’ve heard some of these successful individuals suggest ‘disappear for 6 months and focus on yourself’. I can’t say that I have done this successfully because I didn’t experience really disappearing and/or doing it for 6 months. I will say that I attempted it and it was A LOT harder to do than I thought.
I will not make this about me but just to mention a few things I struggled with so if you decide to do this, just be aware. There was a dull feeling of FOMO just hanging over my head, wanting to be involved in things that my friends were doing so at times, I did give in. I was in a transition where I wanted to isolate myself but then I also wanted experiences; this made me feel like I needed my friends to enjoy new experiences. I have been that friend that was reliable, was there for my friends, and cared about how they were doing so just disappearing was EXTREMELY hard for the position I put myself in. My EGO was struggling andI hated it. However, I am re-introducing myself to this challenge again and this time around, its going better.
Has there ever been a time in your life, where you had a solid day of productivity or even just a few hours where you were just ON IT and got so much done? So imagine that, but for 6 months and it’s all about you. As self-centered as it may sound, I do believe it is necessary for someone who is feeling really stuck. I don’t believe there is a best way to do it because we all have different goals and different things going on in our lives, butI do think there are rules that we should make sure to follow in the process. Let’s talk about those rules, don’t hesitate to give yourself rules that are not mentioned.
Rule #1:
No Distractions. You have to be completely honest with yourself when it comes to this. A distraction is something or someone that takes your attention away from what you’re really working towards. List your distractions and come up with something else you can do instead that could be entertaining but is helping you towards your goals. You can reward yourself for staying on track, maybe with your favorite dessert, or treating yourself to a fun social outing where you can meet new people. Figure out what works for you and don’t forget your goals. Sometimes, just seeing the results of not letting your distractions get in the way will be enough for you to keep them away.
Rule #2
Get out of your comfort zone. I know it’s scary, but it truly is worth it and once you do it, it’s not scary anymore. We all have something or someone that we run to when in uncomfortable situations, you gotta push through it for the betterment of your future. These situations are meant to help us grow in whatever way the situation requires us to. Sometimes it’s going against your habit like being there for people but this time you have to say no and you really don’t want to. It could be going to a social event by yourself(social anxiety takes a hold) but you gotta push through it so you can have experiences, so you can meet new people. If one of your goals in this 6 month challenge is to make new friends that are aligned with this new version of you then you have to take on the personality of this new version and meet those people. They will not meet you at your home, i mean yes there’s online friends but that’s where it is comfortable. Start saying yes to things you normally don’t say yes, of course within reason. I am absolutely not saying to agree to do things that put you in imminent danger, but new yes, exciting yes, something challenging in a good way ABSOLUTELY. Love yourself enough to support your growth. In no time, you’ll be so comfortable with being uncomfortable.
Rule #3
Be patient with yourself. Isolating yourself from what you’re used to can have an interesting effect on your mental and emotional states. It is, however, a great time to self-reflect and learn about yourself. A lot of thoughts will cross your mind, flashbacks of memories may pop up randomly taking you by surprise, tears may start to fog your eyes and you don’t actually know where they came from. Having time with just you is going to open up a lot of inner dialogue that you haven’t had the time to exchange with yourself. Your relationship with yourself is the most important relationship you can ever have in your lifetime. We often fill our time up with so many distractions and/or running on autopilot that we don’t ever check in with ourself. This is the time to do it. I recommend journaling. At the start, you could just dump all your thoughts, fears, mumble jumbles, whatever it is that crosses your mind and takes up space that you could be utilizing better. This practice can help you realize what kind of internal work you should be doing during this time of focusing on yourself. This journey is something that will be fun, it can be fun of course, but it won’t always be sunshine and rainbows so please be patient with yourself. It’s really one of those “it’s not a sprint, it’s a marathon” type of cases.
I don’t want to overwhelm you guys with too many rules so those are a few that I’m sticking with on this journey and I feel confident in sharing with anyone who would also like to join me. WHat does your life look like 6 months from now? What do you look like 6 months from now? How do you feel at the end of this transformation? What have you accomplished in the last 6 months? Think about these outcomes when you’re writing down your 6 month plan, then live as this person and see how close you truly are to changing your life. Every time you think about doing something or you have to make a decision, think “Would my higher self do this? Does this align with my goals?”. Your future you will definitely thank you for keeping them in check during such a vulnerable shifting time.
Dream big, thrive bigger—until next time!